The emotional impact of a caesarean birth can have a greater impact than any actual surgery. Some mothers feel disappointed in themselves. Feel guilty. They were looking forward to a vaginal birth and had trained for it. Only to have that taken from them and end up with a caesarean. Some women elect for c-sections from the outset. Only to be bullied about their decision.
Your thoughts after caesarean and having a positive attitude toward how your birth played out, is the first step towards healing. So I’m laying out my opinion. As controversial as it may be on this site! But, it’s my opinion, and I don’t expect you to agree with it. I just ask you respect it.
Our attitudes towards our births come from a lot of places. The births our mums had. Our sisters had. Our friends had. The births the mums in our mums’ group had, even though we’ve only just met these women. The birth some celebrity on TV had. The births women haven’t had yet. When it comes to birth – everyone seems to have an opinion about the right birth. And if you don’t have that right birth – there is guilt and torment.
Be kind to yourself.
Well, we all need to get over the negative rhetoric! Regardless of whether the c-section was elective or emergency is irrelevant. A healthy mum and healthy baby are paramount. And it doesn’t make you any less of a mum just because you didn’t push a baby out your vagina.
You will still have to feed your baby. Get up in the middle of the night. Change nappies. Clothe. Wash. Discipline and teach your baby until they are not babies anymore! You will do everything another mother does, a mother that birthed vaginally. Somethings you may do better. And somethings you may do worse than someone else.
Motherhood is one massive learning journey. And so, no – your birth may not have gone as you planned. Or maybe it did. And that’s okay. Treat yourself kindly. Allow yourself to heal. And ignore any negativity from the outside world until you are okay with yourself and your birth.
Big hugs! Sending ♥
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